Fellow on Fellows
By John Vatne
6/8/04

Brian Fellow is not an accredited zoologist, nor does he hold an advanced degree in any of the environmental sciences. He is simply an enthusiastic young man with a sixth grade education and an abiding love for all of God's creatures...share his love tonight on...[ BRIAN FELLOW'S SAFARI PLANET!

Brian Fellow: Good evening and welcome to Brian Fellow's Safari Planet. I'm Brian Fellow!! Tonight we're gonna be meeting an animals who can run fast! [ whispers to camera ] ..i bet they are running right now. [ normal voice ] I'm very excited to meet some new friends. So let's get going!! Our first guest guards bridges and eats trolls!..Please welcome a Billy Goat!

Brian Fellows walks in

Brian Fellow: And who are you?!

Brian Fellows: I'm Brian Fellows, I work for Herdez Competition as a mechanic and outside rear tier changer on the number 55 car.

Brian Fellow: Welcom Herdez!

Brian Fellows: [ chuckles ] No, I'm Brian Fellows form Herdez Competition!

Brian Fellow: I'm Brian Fellow!!!

Brian Fellows: Hi Brian.

Brian Fellow: Your’re not a Billy Goat!

Brian Fellows: Um, no I just have a Goatee.

Brian Fellow: Your Goatee makes you look like Satan!

Brian Fellows: [ smiling ] Well, thanks I guess, so anyway I’m here to talk about the number 55 Herdez Competition Champ Car team. We think the new Push to Pass button will give our driver Mario Dominquez the extra horsepower he needs to be a contender for the championship this year.

Brian Fellow: I thought you were a Billy Goat, not a horse!

Brian Fellows: Well I’m not a goat, but our car does have over 750 horsepower in race trim.

Brian Fellow: You put horses in cars, that’s crazy!!

Brian Fellows: Not horses, horsepower. We race in the Champ Car World Series where the cars have over 750 horsepower.

Brian Fellow: I'm Brian Fellow!!

Brian Fellows: Yes I know, you all ready said that.

Brian Fellow: Do you know Seabiscuit. That little horse would run and run and run. Then the Black Stallion wanted to eat him, but the little gnome on Seabiscuit said “oh no you don’t” and they rain away to Fantasy Island.

Brian Fellows: Yah, um, he was the little train that could.

Brian Fellow: You’re a train? I thought you were a Billy Goat.

Brian Fellows: Don’t you remember, I’m Satan.

Brian Fellow: I'm Brian Fellow!!

Brian Fellows: Yes, you’re Brian Fellow.

Brian Fellow: That was CRAZY!

Brian Fellows: That was something.

Brian Fellow: I'm Brian Fellow! And thats all the time we have for today! Join me next time when we meet a Hermit Crab....that sounds CRAZY!! I'm Brian Fellow!!